Booze Banter

The Short Pour


At a Macallan event, the brand representative had defined a pour as the measure of the company. So, at an abbreviated assembly of the Kipling Road Society, if one member should entertain a “short” pour should the host take offense? Or, rather should the host accept the short pour when measured against the total number of pours in recognition one’s efforts to sample? This is a question that could be debated ad infinitum akin to a chicken or the egg debate. I, of course, am not one to offend my host so I opt for a strong pour in deference to the company and the distance to home. Some of the other booze dancers temper their pour in relation to the hour at which they must soon arise or the amount of other libations consumed over the course of the day. As a result, I am left in a quandary. Am I too liberal in my pour or are the other booze dancers too conservative in theirs?

5 replies »

  1. Some Whiskey quotes for the debate:

    “Too much of anything is bad, but too much of good whiskey is barely enough.”
    – Mark Twain

    “Logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities.”
    – Edward John Moreton Drax Plunkett, 18th Baron of Dunsany

    “I’m a simple man. All I want is enough sleep for two normal men, enough whiskey for three, and enough women for four.”
    – Joel Rosenberg

    “They say some of my stars drink whiskey, but I have found that ones who drink milkshakes don’t win many ball games.”
    – Casey Stengel

    “Shut up and Drink”
    – The Wookie

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  2. I assume that you are referring to my practice of short but numerous pours. If my drinking habits have offended you Sir Limpingway, then I must ask for your forgiveness. Understand that when faced with 12+ bottles of highly desirable adult beverages, I feel that it is my duty to sample as many of them as possible, for this is a journey of discovery.

    This reminds me of an old joke…

    A young bull and an old bull were standing on top of a hill overlooking a herd of cows. The young bull says, “Why don’t we run down there and f#$% a couple of cows?” The old bull replies, “Lets walk down and f#$% them all!”

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    • Which one of you is the “Old Bull”? You are both full of Bull$#!+

      For the record we have all consumed gallons of booze at each other’s homes over the past couple of years. So the generosity of the host and the appreciation of the guest should not be in doubt. It is only the health of our livers that should be questioned.

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      • Though you may be the Youngest Bull, you shovel more than your fair share of bulls#%$! I’m just trying to keep up is all.

        And what’s with you and all this liver talk? Relax and have a drink. I’m sure you’ll be just fine. 🙂

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